Dear U

Dear U,

How I wish I could to tell you how much I love u

How I wish I am not afraid and not ashamed to tell u my feelings

But I just could not

U are so lucky to have more than one woman loved u

And that news just break my heart again and again

But is there any chance for me now? I wonder..

Is there any chance for u to consider me again (if u considered me before)

Dear u..

Why I  was so stupid being too afraid to tell u that I want u with all my heart

To spend the rest of my life together with u and them

I always have that picture in mind and I still have it now

Should I erase it? I should, shouldn’t I? but I don’t want

Because deep down my heart I still hope that it would happen one day

Life must goes on no matter how hard it is to face reality

How heavy and hurt every steps that I take

But I always remember to put a smile on my face, to have my chin up

Because if it meant to be it would be.

Only u, and u and u

Have u ever feel like going some where far far away to no one know you?
To the place where you are a stranger?
That no one bother about you?

I feel like it once awhile when i feel so down,so sad, so emotional.

There were times that I just need to get out from the usual crowd,
to meet someone else even for awhile like having a lunch together,
Or..a cup of coffee, or a cup of ice-cream and a book to accompany me.

It is not that hate them but if u r being with the same person everyday,
every time (virtually or f2f),
u need to 'run' a way.
Not so long, just a few hours....

It is not wrong to do that right?!

Just a space for yourself,
Do whatever you feel like to do,
Just a time for you n you n you...alone.

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Assalamualaikum. 

Last weekend memang our house full coz most of the siblings were here with the family. So rumah yg selalunya sunyi jadi 'havoc' dengan suara budak2 gelak. We were talking about names then my eldest niece ckp in her class ada 4 org nama AIsyah. Nurul Nur Aisyah, Nur Aisyah then ada sorang ni that her nama memang menarik perhatian because her name is Aisyah but people called her Bella budak hot. I was like 'apa, budak hot?'. The reason is because she got followers laki more than perempuan dalam twitter. So I  searched her in twitter (skodeng time..ehem..). Twitter tak private, followers berlambak almost 2000++. fuh! scroll tgk gambar, read the tweets. Basically budak ni tak tweet pun. byk tweets because of the followers statistic. Gambar byk selfie with muka ala2 comel.

Actually bukan nak cakap pasal ni but i want to write about social media. As we know Malaysian is top 5 to have social media account. so you can imagine hebat tak hebat rakyat malaysia dalam up to date pasal benda2 ni. Memang tak surprise la if budak sekolah rendah pun ada account FB, Twitter or IG. I don't mind psl tu tapi wat makes me menyampah is the pictures they posted. Selfie muka ala2 comel tu dah biasa sgt but gambar half naked. i fell sad for them,the parents. I am wondering, parents diorg tak tau ke. Pastu like 100 n mostly lelaki. Saddest part is yang liked and post gambar are Islam, melayu. And God knows if ada org yg just save our picture in their phone. Have we ever think about it? Trust me it happens. Gambar yang bertudung pun ada org nak save, gambar yang tak bertudung? Think about it please.

Sumpah, sometimes nak nangis tengok their picture especially yg kita kenal. I just pray for them, to realise that this world is more to explore, this world is fulls with cabaran, that their life is a long way to go. Another thing that makes me sad is org yg comment or likes are those yang ada blood related or best friend. Shouldn't a good friend/person tegur if they really love them? Kesian dengan parents mereka. Mereka masih muda. They have potential tapi I don't want them to be successful person tapi gaya macam ni. I have been through my teenage life and I regret few things I did. I don't want them to regret in their future like me. I pray that someone could lead them to straight path.

Takut dengan dunia sekarang. Teenagers selamber letak pictures mcm2. Dulu nak post pikir dua tiga kali even parents bukan dalam friend list. I know u didn't wear hijab but please jgn letak gambar yg nampak hampir segala-galanya. Tak manis!

At this point, I am bersyukur sebab my niece tak ada any media social account. At least she listens to her mother. I always tell her 'tak payah ada account FB ke IG ke'.

I am not married and I am afraid if I have a child, could I raise them properly? Penuh dengan kasih sayang, Islamic knowledge in this horror world? I hope I can when I have one :)

aci?

Terlalu ramai yang buat statement and tanya soalan di bawah. So this will be my script.

Aci?

P/s: some questions shouldn't be asked coz we have no answer for that.

Respek pls!

Somehow I need you to respect my feeling too....