Friday, December 18, 2009

Movie After Exam




Habis je exam I went to watch The Storm Warriors. Planned nak tgk pkl 9pm but since we reached there late (hujan that nite) so we changed to 10pm punya show.

Memang excited nak tgk movie ni at first place coz The Storm Riders dulu2 best sgt2. First time tengok Storm Riders hati dah terpikat. I can watch it over and over again. So, bila The Storm Warriors keluar, excited coz I wanna know what happen next to Wind and Cloud. If I'm not mistaken this movie is from a comic (I'm not sure which one coz I'm not fancy of any of it).

To me, the movie is not like what I expected. Nak kata bosan tak la jugak. Tapi tak best sgt la. Action memang byk but like what my friend said tak banyak scene battle between a bunch of people. It is more to one to one battle and more to self-conflict. Boring.

Ending pun tak best. Bila dah hbs I was like "dah habis ke? Macam tu je ending?". Tak pe lah since I wanted to watch this movie dah lama. Dah dapat pun though a bit disappointing.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Back To Square One

Exam dah habis. Yabedabedo!! Lepas satu azab. Lama tggu exam habis. Tunggu je la lagi 2 bulan nak dapat results. Time tu confirm takut.

The ques macam soalan membunuh diri. Berganda-ganda susah. Mak aii. Kalau macam ni lah standard lama la nampak gayanya nak habis semua.Tapi perjuangan mesti diteruskan. Cannot and would not give up.

So ape plan after exam? Tido puas2. Kemas bilik. Macam kapal pecah dah bilik ni. Back to square one la. Dah tak boleh nak relax. Dulu tak payah buat ape2. Just sit in the room and study. Next week jadik babysitter Aisyah. I have plan for both of us. Movies, baking, and arts. And yes, I will make sure she study. Habislah budak kecik tu. Tak tau either enough time or not.

Next year gonna be a whole new year. New life, new place, new mission and the brand new 'Alia. Cewahh..ape yang new pun tak tau. Wait and see jelah.

Btw, Atiqah is coming back for good to M'sia after 3 years berhempas-pulas di Australia. 25th December she'll reach LCCT. At last ade jugak member kat rumah ni. Berkotak-kotak barang die. She told me that. I wonder where she will puts all her things.

Argh..lapar plak. Nak makan jap. Daa..

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Sanggup Ke?



Sanggup ke nak hadapi semua tu? Kalau ikutkan hati rasa tak nak langsung jadi. Tapi sampai bila nak tahan kehendak sendiri? Sampai bila nak sorokkan benda ni? sampai bila nak jadik pengecut?

Even semua tak confirm lagi, bila pikir benda tu pun dah cuak. Bila org tny kenapa, memang tak boleh jawab sedangkan benda ni yg kena first sekali prepare kalau dah confirm. Keputusan berani mati ni. Risiko tinggi sgt2.

Tak pernah terfikir dan tak mungkin diterima akal bg sesetgh orang. Anything boleh jadik kn. Kalau elak macam mane pun kalau benda nak jadik tetap akan jadik.

Adoiyai. Berat jugak kepala ni. Ape2 pun keputusan akan dibuat nanti. Bukan sekarang.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Blank

I just wanna say yes, but I can't. but I also can't say no. So, what should I do?
Gilalah. Dah lah nak dekat exam boleh pulak pikir pasal lain.

Focus 'Alia. Remember what are your priorities. Study and family. Lain2 would be next in the list, ok?

Deadline. Benci. Nak drag tak boleh coz it involve others. Argh..have to construct ayat yg best. Yang sedap telinga mendengarnya.

Nak run away from it, lagi la. Nothing can be solved if u run away. Face it with courage.

N to you, why this has to be our fate?

Kita belasah je nak tak? Lepas tu baru pikir. This is what we call adventure. Try and error. Tneet....maksudnya kena putuskan. If terus berdenyut, ada nadi means we continue.

Hahaha. Kepala dah weng.

To be continued....Study!!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Trap

I'm trap in my own words. I should just zip my mouth from saying it.

Oh God,what should I do? Keep the promise or search for a reason to save myself?
Hurm..I have 3 weeks to think about it. Lot of things I need to consider. Every single aspect. But I believe everything happened for a reason n we have the power to change the fate if we try our best.

p/s:thanks Enah for spending ur time listen to my story early in the morning.

Monday, December 7, 2009

Musim Kawin

Musim org kawin dah tiba..yes...kat fridge penuh with kad jemputan..but mostly are invitations for my parents..but today I went to one of my relative's wedding. After haven't meet or hear about her for a long time tup tup dah kawin. So happy for her.

I went there with A.Along because his family yang lain sakit mata. Sampai di majlis ternganga gak sebab I don't really know them except aunties and uncles yang rapat (sungguh terukkan kerana tidak kenal saudara sendiri). Tapi, lucky me, my favorite uncle n aunt sampai with their children a few minutes after that.

Makanan tadi memang best. If before this the foods were prepared by caterer but this time org kampung bergotong-royong menyiapkan makanan. Hardly to see that nowdays. Especially when the majlis is in the middle of KL. Lebih2 lagi memang yang masak adalah org Minang. Just name it from the nasi to the lauk n kuih. Siap ade lucky draw, tarian n pengantin baling duit n gula-gula for the kids. For me it was traditional enough bila wedding macam ni.

Then, sepupu n makcik n pakcik yang lain sampai. Borak punya borak tiba-tiba my cousin asked, "alia, bila nak pergi makan cendol lagi?".Sebabnya, a few months before we to Melacca konon-konon nak makan cendol tapi dek terlalu lama singgah di R&R, terlepas la peluang.

So, I told them, "No job = no money. No money = no cuti2 Malaysia.".
"Tapi, kalau Alia yang bawak dan ada org yg nak sponsor macam mane?". Dlm hati gembira sebab diorg sanggup sponsor. I just need to guide them.

"Ada org nak sponsor ke?", sudah tahu bertanya pula. "Tunggu Alia habis exam. Alia tak ada problem kalau nak pergi after exam." Begitulah kesudahannya cerita nak pergi makan cendol.

Then, next ques, "Lepas ni sapa yang naik pelamin?". People, don't look at me. Look someone else pls. The truth is, that event is not in my agenda for year 2010.

p/s:I miss my Angah. Thanks for the advices and supports. The burden dah kurang sikit. *hugs*

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Ntah..tak tau...

aku tidak marah..tapi aku hanya kecewa kerana terlalu byk yg tidak diketahui hingga ke hari ini..tapi syukurlah...sekurang-kurangnya aku tidak tersilap langkah dalam membuat percaturan hidup sendiri..terima kasih Tuhan kerana memberi ku hati yg keras dan tidak mudah mengalah...

cuma aku berharap perkara yang sama tidak berulang di masa hadapan..

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Still same...

The truth is....
I can't never forget u..
N the feeling is still the same...
Haih...

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Happy Nyer


I received a very2 good news yesterday. This is what I need time tgh2 tension. Sungguh gembira. Can't write more. Wait until everything is confirm n majlis berjalan then I can further tell. Happy nyer!

Friday, October 30, 2009

Exam Is Coming..owh no!



Exam is coming in less than 50days. Ya Allah takutnya. Dah lama tak amik exam. Study pun tak sangat. Suppose time2 ni tgh menghadap nota tapi boleh berblog pulak.

This sitting I'm taking 2 papers. P1 n P3. Both reading subjects. Tomorrow start revision dah. 9 days berturut2 nnt tgk muka Parminder tu but he's a good lecturer and suka buat lawat though most of the times lawak yg tak sepatutnya diberitahu. As always, he will say 'academic discussion'.

ACCA susah la. Patutlah ramai yg repeat. Even org cakap it is same level as bachelor degree with hons. mcm lagi susah je. Nasib dpt exemption 9 papers. Wish me luck k.

Cinta Pandang Pertama

Oh berdebar-debar hati nya
Kali pertama bertentang mata
Inilah pengalaman
Harus ditempuhi tiap insan...

I bet everyone or almost everyone have this experience..LOVE AT THE FIRST SIGHT! I have a few experiences about this..

1)Year 1994 (darjah 3)
Budak laki tu a family friend to our family. Met during a camp organized by my Umi's biro.cute gak la die tapi he is 4 years older than me kot n die suka sorang akak ni. Sape la nak pandang budah selekeh n selebet like me ni. Now, ade jugak jumpa die setahun tak sekali n he still looks da same boyish look.

Year 1996 (Darjah 5)
This boy was staying at my housing area. Jalan 5 min dah sampai rumah die. Met him waktu die dtg rumah main2 with my brother. Oh, lupa..his name is Faiz n die ni my bro's friend n 1 year older than me. Chinese looks n muka pun baik je. Die tau dat I like him sbb ade org bocorkan rahsia (malu jer). Tapi die suka org lain. Jiran kitaorg jugak. They went ngaji sama2 (I didnt. Blaja kat rumah je). Then die pindah somewhere. Last time jumpa year 2001 at my open house.

Year 1998 (Form 1)
Yang ni lagi complicated. Ternampak during balik from school. He was inside a bus. Comel je. His name is Qusyairi. Our school sebelah2 je. Tapi mane berani nak approach.Then masuk jer form 2, mula naik LRT. tak jumpa die. After a few years terjumpa die dekat my school's Family Day. Tgk2 die dah ade gf n his gf during that time was my friend.

Year 1999 (Form 2)
This boy nama die Aziz. We both met during latihan Hari Merdeka at SMK Chocrane. Ntah ape yg made me tertarik with him sampai sekarang tak tau. Ili (my close friend that time) helped me to get his biodata (time ni nk berkenalan main tukar2 biodata). He asked for mine. So, we exchanged. tup..tup..he called my house on the 31st August. We met for the first time at Pesta Buku @ PWTC. sungguh membosankan rite? But we met with the present of my friends. Last2 I rejected him for no reason. Hahaha...

Year 2000 (Form 3)
This boy I met dlm LRT. He was a prefect at his school n same as Qusyairi, our school sbelah2 jer. Wat made me tertarik with him because he was so smart n looked neat in his uniform. With my friend's bro help, I managed to get his phone no. n die la jadi our middle person.Suka ati je kan.We went out to KLCC during school break. Atiqah teman. Waktu tu macam excited + nervous. Siap beli baju baru coz nk impress die.Bila dah jumpa, face to face, he is so damn different from wat I know. Then, we didnt contact each other atas beberapa reasons.

Year 2002 (Form 5)
This boy is also my neighboor. I saw him during Majlis Raya for this area. But that time I was in a relationship so simpan je la dlm hati. I had his picture. Just for fun. Suka tgk his face.

Year 2008
After more than how many years, during Aida's convo at UPM, I met this guy. Smart dowh. Actually Aida did mentioned about him, her course-mate a few months before.We did contacted each other thru YM and FB but now mcm dah putus hubungan. Dia lah paling lama yg saya minat :). God knows wat happen to him rite now. The last time I know, die keje as PTD at Kementerian Kerjaraya.

Sometimes, I wonder wat happen to all of them. Dah kawin ke?kerja kat mane?wat r they doing rite now? hehehe. Tapi skarang tak boleh jatuh cinta pandang pertama. Macam tak releven je. Pandang 10 kali tak tentu org tu boleh dipercayai but kuasa Tuhan sape boleh lawankan. Kalau dah namanya jodoh jatuh cinta jugak. Bak kata pepatah 'Dari mata jatuh ke hati'.


Sunday, October 18, 2009

9 Months, 2 Weeks

An amazing video posted by Marini. Just wanna share with u. Touching n amazing how our journey start in our mom's womb.

video

Friday, September 18, 2009

Raya La Pulak


Lagi 2 days nak raya. Sedih bila memikirkan bulan yg mulia, Ramadhan nak meninggalkan kita. Bila dipikirkan apa yang aku dah buat pada bulan ini. Alangkah ruginya diri ini bila amalan sunat kurang dilakukan. Aku berharap segala amal dan ibadat ku diterima oleh Nya.

Esok Angah akan sampai di KL and I will pick her up at KLIA. She will be here for a week utk raya. Atiqah pulak sampai on the 3rd raya. Sepatutnya dia dah sampai semalam tapi atas sebab2 tertentu dia terpaksa tunda kepulangan raya tahun ni. Aku bersyukur dan gembira sgt2 sebab buat pertama kalinya selepas 12 tahun kami beraya dengan semua ahli keluarga di sini. Yang lagi seronok, kami ada ahli baru iaitu Siti Nur Husna. Anak A.Long yang berusia 2 bulan. She's so adorable and cute. Ape yang diharapkan raya tahun ni lebih bermakna.

To all my friends, I want to wish u Salam Aidilfitri. Maaf atas segala silap yang dilakukan. Kekadang mulut tak cover dan tak perasan kata2 yg diucapkan itu menyakitkan hati. Tangan dan kaki pun kekadang pernah menyakitkan org lain tanpa sedar. Akan diprbaiki segala kelemahan pada masa depan :). Moga korang semua menyambut lebaran kali ini dengan org yg tersayang. Bagi yang tak dapat beraya ngan family bcoz u r somewhere else, don't worry, raya tetap raya, yang penting semangat. Huhuhu. Yang nak pulang ke kampung dan bakal pulang ke KL or tempat lain berhati-hati dijalan raya. Semoga selamat di tempat yang dituju :).

p/s: This would be my last post until minggu depan. Banyak persiapan tak buat lagi. Kuih, cake, bilik n etc menantikan utk dibereskan..

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Majlis Berbuka

3 days in a row buka puasa outside. Jumaat (11/09), Sabtu (12/09) and Ahad (13/09). Poket dari tebal jadik nipis dah skarang..hehehe..sampai Umi pun bising sebab asyik keluar jer..nak buat mcm ner Umi, I have lots of friends..hehe..byk sgt group :p. Lepas ni I'll stay at home bukak puasa yer.

Jumaat went to buka at Cozy Corner at Ampang Park. Makan lauk2 jer. 4 org jer. Supposed Yana join but die ade hal last minute. So, me, mashi, Wan and Pejal jer. Nothing much that we talked about. We just catch up with our latest update since almost 3 months tak jumpa. Tapi lauk tak pedas. Sungguh frust.hehe..

Mashi kata lauk ikan ni masam..ntah...ye kot..lapar sgt makan jer..

Me and mashi. Muka happy selepas berbuka. Kenyang :)


Then Saturday buka bersama geng UM plak di Coffee, Sugar and Spices @ near Taman Kosas. It is a buffet of RM20nett. Not bad la the food. I just ate nasi kerabu jer n some kuih muih. Ade foods lain like spaghetti, Nasi Dagang and sandwich. Then, surprisingly, ade celebration for those yg lahir during August (me ;p) and September (Haiza n Mashi). Well, I already know their plan sbb tu memang menjadi kebiasaan. Hehehe.


Tiga jejaka yang hadir

Yeay..cake..

Birthday Girls :)


Then the next day, I went to IKEA for berbuka with budak2 matrix. Knape IKEA? coz the buffet is reasonable (RM16.70 after tax kira murahlah kan), near shopping complexes and I heven't been there for a while.

I just sent the details of the event thru SMS and FB. 14 people came for the berbuka. Since,we can't do any reseravation so, me and Yana awal2 lagi sudah terpacak beratur pukul 5pm. 6.30 pm baru boleh masuk.

Before we can take the foods we waited for others to come. Lambat btol masing2. Line memang panjang tak payah nak cakap la. 4 of us amik makanan and guys would take the foods from us because once dah masuk u have to beratur balik and confirm tak sempat nak berbuka if everyone buat mcm tu.

Menu for that day was kerabu ayam, ikan masin, siput sedut lemak cili api, daging paprik, ayam, sayur goreng, macaroni goreng, kuw teow goreng, kuih koci, blueberry jelly and air soya n tebu.

Makanan yg berderet di atas meja...sedap..

Semua yang hadir. Tapi time ni Aysah, E.G and Meen dah pulang


Mashi, Mizan and Meen (she's pregnant for 5 months dah)

Yana and Me



That nite kami gelak bagai nak rak. Kenangan lma di zaman2 matrix diimbau, org tu minat yg ni. Ade jer lawak dari masing2. Agaknye if the next day tak kerja, kami boleh lepak lebih lama. Tapi disebabkan masing2 kerja, terpaksa melupakan hasrat nak stay lama. Yang pasti, insyaAllah kami akan berjumpa lagi raya nanti. I'm waiting for the open house :)

Monday, September 7, 2009

No regret..

"i'm happy for you! but still. am feeling guilty. :("

Comment posted by farhana at my FB. Relax Fana. Tak de ape2 yg nak rasa bersalah. U didnt do anythg wrong :)...yes..u advised me to do it. Others too. Tapi tak bermaksud ape yg terjadik tu ur fault. This is the risk that I am taking and I only hope that thing will get better after this regardless of die sama mcm I ker tak. I'm glad and thankful coz I have a friend like u. Supporting me in everything that I'm doing.

I'm teaching my self not t regret anything I had done and so far I didn't (as if..haha). Ade la skit like tak blaja btol2 during my degree, return to someone yg I know memang hopeless, n lambat amik action padahal bnd tu mcm between life n death.

My principle is Allah gives us choices, n it is all depends on us. So why must we regret? Yes, I admit I cried before, Who hasn't? But I am thankful coz the experiences teach me how to be a better person, open my eyes to the real meaning of life. I live to make others especially my loved ones' life be more meaningful and to make them happy.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

and.....

Moral of the story...

1) Btolkan niat setiap kali hendak melakukan sesuatu
2) Ikhlaskan diri setiap masa
3) Jgn melambat-lambatkan benda yang baik
4) Pikir sakit org lain juga..jgn pikir keseronokan sendiri..
5) Think before U do

Sekian, terima kasih..

p/s: I am so mad at someone. Plz let thing be normal again..

Thursday, August 6, 2009

My first award

My first award..setelah disuruh menerima award ni saya pun ambil..thanx bro (ceh..mcm dpt anugerah ape plak kn)

1) copy award untuk diletakkan di blog anda




2) nyatakan 6 fakta menarik tentang pemberi award ini

* bongsu and manja
* one of the best cook..u should cook more often
* nvr seen him marah
* susah nak bgn pagi..kena membebel baru bgn
* pandai main gitar tp tak penah dgr die main pun
* suka menyakat

3) setiap blogger mesti menyatakan 9 fakta/hobi diri sendiri

* stubborn..super duper
* working n hate it
* taking pic, baking, n futsal are my main interest
* talk a lot
* tgk wayang anyone??
* open minded
* loves the family and friends
* on diet
* studying

4) anda perlu memilih 10 penerima award seterusnya dan describe tentang mereka

Ruzanna - best friend
Marini- emo tp good listener
Fadzly- future doctor
Fatin- tak lama lagi nak tunang (har har har)
Farhana - akan pergi redang bersama2

A bit here..a bit there..

"Alia, kalo VRI bleh release esok bgtau la. Bleh akak print siap2 pagi2 esok"
"Dah bleh la kak. Everything dah clear. Tapi akak check la in case alignment lari ke"

Minggu ni jer 2 accounts released. Fuh, lega tak yah cakap la. Last minute punya account. I was so stressed last week. 3 accounts FYE Dec.Supposedly, 31 July kena submit but nasib baik sgt2 bleh extend 6 days. Manager tak yah ckp la. Skit2.."Alia, where is ur ......""Alia, can I review ur file".

I was almost breakdown. I don't mind working until 11pm but I don't have transport. Marini was kind enough to sent me back a few times. Last week almost everyday I reached home 12midnight. keje, keje, keje...work, work, work...

But to tell u the truth, I was tension but I don't think sampai tak bleh rehat. I went to lunch as usual, a bit of chatting, Facebooking. Actually k gak like this. But not frequent sgt. Nnt boleh pengsan.

Some may wonder why at the end of the month baru nak submit. The account should have ready 3 months after the yr end. Tapi biasa la, client..1 bulan baru nak bg. If u get client yg memahami, yg bleh corporate then, it will be no prob. But wat about client yg when u tak push tak buat. At the end of the day, yg kena auditor. Yg bg account lambat..client. Fair tak? Takkan..

I have to wait for few weeks je lagi.. Then I 'm done here. No more PKF..no more Marilyn, inspector gadget, Vincent (these are the best part)..N this time I will ensure...NO TURNING BACK!!

Monday, August 3, 2009

Die Dtg Lagi

Kringg..kringg..

"Hello. Alia ade org from ___SB dtg bagi doc. Dtg depanlah ambil."
"OK".."aaarghh"..kopi tertumpah. Inilah akibatnya terlalu nervous (nervous ker??) Bila dgrnya someone come to send doc from this co I noe who is that person.

So, berlari-larilah saya di dalam office menuju ke depan. Apa motif berlari pun tak tau.

Sampai kat depan receptionist bagi envelope. Aik knape die ade lagi..ngatkan dah pergi after drop the doc.

"ade kena sign mane2 tak?"
"tak de"
"Lari ker?" "aah..byk keje la"
"owh" dan die pun bgn menuju ke pintu kluar..

Bila samapai di tempat rupa2nye signing pages ker. Kena buat attestation ni. K.Ina mintak hantar kat Joan coz she will send it together with others. Bila nak jumpa Ms Joan lalu lift.

"eh, tak turun lagi?"
"hurm..tak. Lambat la lift ni"sambil jawab senyum2 malu..alala..comelnyer :)
"jgn guna lift yg ni. Guna yg sbelah". Padahal sama jer. disebabkan tak de modal nak borak, kluar lah ayat yg tak logik.

Balik from Ms Joan punya bilik, Marini tegur. "Alia dah tersenyum. Tadi tension jer. Nak tegur pun takot. Siap berlari2 dalam ofis"

Wheewww...yeah..he changed my mood. Just like that. One super short meeting can change my entire day :) thanks to him..hopefully will meet him later.

I resign

Dengan bangganya saya telah meletak jawatan minggu lps..nk update last week tak berkesempatan coz I was so bz..everyday blk lambat until nak update pun tak menyempat.

I have no backup job..so I am actively searching for a job..kalo tak de nmpk gayanya ade lah yg makan pasir next month..InsyaAllah dpt..

Friday, July 31, 2009

=(

I realise two things can make me cry. First, when I see any of my loved one been hurt or it is because I regret of something I had done.

Few days ago I answered a quiz. One of the question is "When was the last time u cried?". My answer was a few months ago. The conclusion from the quiz is I am fragile, easily hurt. WTH..mane ade. I'm being such a tough girl tau. Tak nak dah nangis2 ni. Big girl dont cry ok.

But then last Monday, I cried like hell. For the very first time I burst into tears in front of someone that I'm not close with. That day someone that I trust, respect, that I thought will protect me from harm hurt me a lot. Angah n I cried together over the phone. However, I am glad bcoz I have friends that being really caring and supportive. Thanx guys. Really appreciate it. Though I only be friend less than a year with some of them.

I failed to protect her. And I am truly regret. If I could have one wish I would ask to turn back time before this thing happen.

I always said to people "Allah wont test u if He knows that u can't bear it". But it is hard when its happen to u. I pray n pray for our happiness. I pray that we will get our normal life again. I pray n I hope this thing will end faster.

For Umi, I always love u. I promise I won't leave u until this thing settle..until she go and leave us alone. I always be besides u no matter wat happen..

Sunday, July 26, 2009

The Climb

I can almost see it
That dream I am dreaming
But there's a voice inside my head saying
"You'll never reach it"

Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking

But I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down
But no, I'm not breaking

I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most, yeah
Just gotta keep going

And I, I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on

'Cause there's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Somebody's gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

Keep on moving, keep climbing
Keep the faith, baby
It's all about, it's all about the climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith, whoa

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Stress..sad..disappointed..angry...




I am so sad..i feel so stress...so disappointed..
With my own self..

I wanna cry..but I can't..
I wanna scream but I can't..
I wanna sleep but I don't feel like it..

What ever I did nothing can make this feeling disappear..

I just wanna talk to someone that I can trust..
I called Ruz but she's working..
I called Marini..she didn't pick up..
I called my friend but my the sadness didn't go away..

Oh God..pls help me go through this stage..
Pls let me be strong..
One month...
Then I'm going to open a new book..a new life..

Friday, July 17, 2009

Accidently Shopping

Pernah tak any of u yg 'tershopping'?meaning...tak de intention nak shopping plus cash kat tgn tak de plus tak de credit card tapi at last shopping jugak?

Tu yg terjadik pada diri ini. Gara2 excited tgk org shopping and I was only doing window shopping (I wont shop if I dont have intention to do so) akhirnya ter'accident' shopping.

Lepas tgk Transformers kat OU, Yana nak beli cardigan. Lepas tu tgh jalan2 near TGV, I stopped then hold this one shoe kat this one kedai (I forgot the name of the shop). Lawa, cun, cute. Bila tgk price..hurm..tak mahal pun. Then I put down. Haiza pulak ambik.

"Eh, comel la kasut ni"

"Memang la comel".

"Miss, can u gv saiz 6".

There u go. Haiza tried the shoe. I cont browsing the shoes in the shop. Yana pun. Haiza decided to buy the shoe. Then, she saw another shoe. Ok lah. tak pe. Her money. Not mine. Hati ni mcm geram jer tapi tahan coz Haiza beli 2 kasut n one of it kasut yg I really2 like. I reminded myself.No shopping Alia.

Then we continued walking. Singgah pulak kat F.O.S. Masuk as usual. We were inside there almost 30mins. Believe it or not. I almost buy a t-shirt. Haiza n Yana pun almost buy something for themselves.

Later, we went inside Padini (dah pulak) since I asked for it. Just for fun. Thought tak lama dalam tu but rupa2nya Haiza bought (I'm not sure how many) pants and shirts. Hahaha..bershopping sakan rupanya Haiza ni..

After that we wanna go for dinner. On the way to Pizza Hut, we met Aidil n Mimi. When Mimi said we bershopping sakan, dgn nada yg agak berlagak I replied

"Mie, Alia tak shopping tau. Haiza and Yana jer". I was proud with myself. Haha..

But then, I cant resist myself bila masuk WH. I really like this pant and a blouse. I really wanna buy it. But I dont have cash on hand or even a credit card. And these two young ladies pulak provoked me to buy. And I did. I bought it. N using wat do u think? I borrowed from Haiza.

And there u go. From dpt menahan nafsu nk shopping at last I bought things I dont need. Worse, I used someone credit card.

Monday, July 6, 2009

:)

11 months ago....

Height:159cm
Weight:49kg

Last week (30 June 2009)

Height:159cm (still the same)
Weight:______kg (a few kilos bertambah)

Went to the same place as 11 months ago to do audit. But this time I went alone. Sungguh membosankan. Met the same faces.

12 pm sumthing..

A: Tak pergi lunch ker? Takkan diet kot.
Me: Belom lagi pukul 1. Jap lagi la.
A: Awak dah nampak...gemuk skit (darn!!)
Me: Ramai ckp macam tu.
A: Tak byk skit jer. (Ayat cover ceh..)sbb suka ati kot.
Kwn A: Sbb nak kawin kot (wow!! assumption tak bleh blah)
Me: Tu lagi jauh. Calon pun tak de.

A dan kwnnye gelak...and I walked away from the place back to my laptop.

I was so embarrassed for wat both of them said. (malu2 kucing..hihi..)..dari awak tu yg kecik. tak padan ngan umur nak ckp org.huh!!

I gain weight not because I'm getting married nor I am 'suka ati'.

Monday, June 29, 2009

Hate Her


I HATE HER. She makes me wait for like 4hours. Nak buat planning jer pun. I t will make no different if jumpa die or not but since I promised her I have to hold to the promise.

I wanna go back la. Cepatlah. I noe u hv a car. u r mobile but not me.

Buat muke 50sen? I wish I can but my face will show my feeling at this moment.

Benci! Benci! Benci. Luckily I dont have to see her face this week!

100% Bahasa Melaysia




Sila jawab soalan-soalan ini dalam Bahasa Melayu sahaja.

1. Bekas kekasih saya adalah :
Orang yg saya mahu lupakan.

2. Saya sedang mendengar :
Bunyi kekunci komputer riba saya apabila ditekan

3. Mungkin saya patut :
pergi ke latihan bola jaring

4. Saya suka :
Duduk rumah, tengok tv, pergi bercuti.

5. Sahabat-sahabat baik saya :
Mereka yang setia berada disisi saya apabila saya memerlukan merka. Mereka akan tegur kesilapan saya dan bersifat jujur.

6. Saya tak faham :
Kenapa di dunia ini ramai orang yg bersifat hiprokrit.

7. Saya kehilangan :
Masa untuk beriadah sejak bekerja

8. Ramai yang berkata :
Saya sudah berisi..hahaha...

9. Makna nama saya :
Cahaya ketinggian

10. Cinta itu adalah :
Satu perasaan yang suci yang tidak sepatutnya dipermainkan.

11. Di suatu tempat, seseorang sedang :
Berlatih bola jaring. (Nak pergi juga)

12. Saya akan cuba :
Untuk berlaku adil kepada sesiapa sahaja.

13. Ayat SELAMANYA membawa maksud :
Kekal bersama

14. Telefon bimbit saya :
Adalah alat untuk saya berhubung dengan adik beradik yang jauh.

15. Bila saya terjaga dari tidur :
"Alamak, sudah pagi ke? Boleh tak saya tidur lagi?"

16. Saya paling meluat apabila :
Orang memotong barisan di waktu pagi dan petang sedangkan orang lain juga beratur dan ingin pergi dan pulang ke tempat kerja/rumah dengan cepat.

17. Pesta / Parti adalah :
Tempat orang bersosial tetapi saya jarang menghadirinya.

18. Haiwan yang paling comel yang saya pernah temui ialah :
Anak harimau belang berwarna putih dan coklat.

19. Peringkat umur yang paling menyeronokkan bagi saya ialah :
Zaman kanak-kanak kerana saya tidak perlu memikirkan apa yang saya lakukan.

20. Hari ini :
Hari Isnin

21. Malam ini saya akan :
Tuam pergelangan buku lali dengan tuala kecil panas.

22. Esok pula saya akan :
Pergi ke Shah Alam keseorangan.

23. Saya betul-betul inginkan :
Perjumpaan dengan adik-beradik saya yang belajar di luar Malaysia

24. Ketika anda lihat wajah anda di hadapan cermin pagi ini :
Mata yang tidak baik lagi.

25. Pusat membeli-belah atau arked permainan :
Tentu sekali pusat membeli-belah

26. Makanan Barat atau Jepun :
Makanan barat

27. Bilik yang terang atau gelap :
Bilik yang gelap. Tapi kalau sudah letih bilik yang terang pun boleh.

28. Makanan segera adalah :
Makanan untuk mereka yang tidak mempunyai masa dan duit yang cukup.

29. Ayat terakhir yang anda katakan pada seseorang?
Maaf, saya tidak dapat membantu anda.

30. Siapa yang anda mahu Tag?
Kawan-kawan saya dan mereka yang tag saya.

Hectic

Last week was tiring. Almost everyday ade je aktiviti yg melibatkan peluh. Monday training netball, wed and thurs training bowling, fri netball lagi and sat training futsal and bowling tournament. Everything because IAFG (Inter Accounting Firm Games) 2009. But bowling jadik reserve je. Pakai kasut jer then I walked here and there tgk score co lain.

Last sat I will say it was fun. For the very first time, we hang out together outside office. Thought not all of us managed to come, however we can do it again next time.

The bowling tournament was held at Sunway Pyramid (not sure wat is the name of the bowling alley). 15 audit firms participated in the game. The game started at 10.30am.
Overall, our team did quite well but since there is no scoreboard therefore, I am not sure how was our performance. And thanx to our supporters yg dtg (compare to last year thn ni ramai)edna, ahmad, CK, Pei Yee, Chee Hong, Mr Lai. the best part was bila dpt mkn free lunch.

That evening, we went to Cheras for futsal training. At first main pakai jeans coz malas nak tukar. Unfortunately, akibat berebut bola, jeans terkoyak. Luckily kat lutut. Later I will send for a repair.

After changed the pants lagi 1 incident happened. My ankle terseliuh. Pun gara2 berebut bola. Not my fault tau. K.salina nak rebut bola from me. Sakit gile. N now my ankle tgh bengkak.

After the practice we went to PapaRich at Tmn Tasik Pemaisuri. Lama jugak kat situ. Byk sesi luahan berlaku. Psl org ni mcm ni n etc. K.ana terpaksa mendengar luahan junior2 dia. As a reminder to us, jadikkan lah kisah yg berlaku kpd rakan2 jr yg lain bila jadik senior.

I have to bear the tiredness as the schedule will be tighter this week as the Netball match will be next Tues on the 7th July. All the best to us!

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Life As Student

My body is aching and I am so damn tired rite now. This is bcoz last week and this week tetiba actively involve in sports. Futsal, netball and bowling. All this because IAFG. can't wait to start and can't wait for it to finish too.

Sometimes I wonder how I can be so active during my school days.

6am -Bgn pegi skolah

7am -sampai skola. baca buku, borak2, gelak2.

7.20am - Assembly. Klas start. best time bila Pend Jasmani. Bleh lari2.

10.15am - Rehat. Makan roti or kekdg tak mkn langsung

10.30am - Sambung klas...

1.10pm - Yes!! skolah hbs. ready for Ko-k or klas tambahan or stay back utk
activiti tamb

3pm/5pm - Tusyen (sampai la pkl 7pm)

Roughly this is how my life was back in school. tapi sometimes, my days can b so hectic where i had to go for tuition after ko-k kat skolah. dgn bag berat, buku di tgn I went to tuition. Naik LRT, naik bas. jalan kaki baru sampai. Where I got all the strength? I also dunno.

Blk dah penat. Mlm buat h.work. kekdg tu bertimbun with buku scrap lagi. My eyes boleh tahan smpi lebih pukul 12am. Esok bgn pkl 6am.

But now nak buat mcm tu pun boleh pengsan kekadang. Is it bcoz I am being lazy rite now? Dulu stay back tak mkn. Skarg kalo tak mkn boleh pening tak bleh buat keje. I wish I can be just the day I was a student.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

If A Man Really Wants U

Thanks to my dear friend Isma for sending this email. As reminder to my myself and to my other friends.

Something for you dear… hugs

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.

Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later. You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...even if he has more education or in a better job.

Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less. Never let a man define who you are. Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with her, he'll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. You should not be the one doing all the ending...compromise is a two way street. You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage... Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals... look for someone complimentary...not supplementary. Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes... when a man always know where you are and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted. Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man. Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Share this with other women and men (just so they know)...You'll make someone smile, another rethink her choices, and another woman prepare.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Talking Crap Again

Saya amat bosan skarang. Saya ade keje tapi malas nak buat. Saya tak tau ape nak jadik dengan saya. Lagipun kerja tu dormant company jer..tapi 3 dormant companies. Manager tak ada. Die pergi meeting. Status saya kat YM pun 'Facabooking'. Nampak sgt saya tak de kerja kan.

Khamis kena pergi Meru utk seminggu. Tak sukanya. Sebab saya kena bgn awal dan balik lambat daripada biasa. Hanya utk dormant company. Kenapalah mereka tidak hantar documents ker office? Boleh saya buat in-house w.pun audit kat luar sebenarnya lagi best dari in-house. Ini kerana tempat itu jauh dan menganggu jadual perjalanan pergi dan balik.

Saya tegur org nak chat tapi die buat dek jer. Tapi lah..tak sudi kot tp saya tak kisah sebab saya ade kwn yg lain bleh layan.

Now I don't noe wat I'm talking about..crap!!

Monday, June 8, 2009

Jenis Golongan Manusia


SHEIKH ABDUL KADIR JAILANI (Pembukaan Kepada Yang Ghaib)
Terdapat empat golongan manusia.
Pertama: Mereka tidak ada lidah dan tidak ada hati dan mereka ini adalah manusia yang bertaraf biasa,berotak tumpul dan berjiwa kerdil, yang tidak mengenang Allah dan tidak ada kebaikan pada mereka. Mereka ini ibarat melukut yang ringan, kecuali mereka dilimpahi dengan kasih sayang-Nya dan membimbing hati mereka supaya beriman serta menggerakkan anggota-anggota mereka supaya patuh kepada Allah. Berhati-hatilah supaya kamu jangan termasuk dalam golongan mereka. Janganlah kamu layani mereka dan bergaul dengan mereka. Merekalah orang-orang yang dimurkai Allah dan penghuni neraka. Kita minta dilindungi Allah daripada pengaruh mereka. Sebaliknya kamu hendaklah cuba menjadikanya diri kamu sebagai orang yang dilengkapi dengan ilmu ketuhanan, guru kepada kebaikan, pembimbing kepada agama Allah, pemimpin dan mengajak manusia ke jalan Allah. Berjaga-jagalah jika kamu hendak mempengaruhi mereka supaya mereka patuh kepada Allah dan beri amaran kepada mereka terhadap apa-apa yang memusuhi Allah. Jika kamu berjuang ke jalan Allah untuk mengajak mereka menuju Allah, maka kamu akan jadi pejuang dan pahlawan ke jalan Allah dan akan diberi ganjaran seperti yang diberi kepada nabi-nabi dan rasul-rasul.
Kedua: Mereka yang ada lidah tetapi tidak ada hati. Mereka bijak bercakap tetapi tidak melakukan seperti yang dicakapkannya. Mereka mengajak manusia menuju ke jalan Allah tetapi mereka sendiri lari daripada Allah. Mereka benci kepada maksiat yang dilakukan oleh orang lain, tetapi mereka sendiri bergelumang dengan maksiat itu. Mereka menunjukkan kepada orang lain yang mereka itu saleh tetapi mereka sendiri melakukan dosa-dosa besar. Bila mereka bersendirian, mereka bertindak selaku harimau. Inilah orang-orang yang dikatakan oleh Rasullullah, “yang paling ditakuti dan aku pun takut dalam kalangan umatku ialah orang alim yang jahat.” Kita berlindung dengan Allah daripada orang alim seperti ini. Oleh itu, lari dan jauhkan diri kamu daripada orang-orang seperti ini. Jika tidak, kamu akan terpengaruh dengan kata-kata manisnya ketika berbicara dan api dosanya itu akan memberikan kekotoran hati kamu yang akan membunuh kamu.
Ketiga: Mereka yang mempunyai hati tetapi tidak ada lidah, dan dia adalah seorang yang beriman. Allah telah memdindingkan mereka daripada makhluk dan menggantungkan di sekeliling mereka dengan tabir-Nya dan memberi mereka kesedaran tentang cacat cedera diri mereka. Allah menyinari hati mereka dan menyedarkan mereka tentang kejahatan yang timbul oleh kerana mencampuri orang ramai dan kejahatan kerana bercakap banyak. Mereka itu tahu bahawa keselamatan itu terletak dalam ‘diam’ dan berkhalwat. Rasullullah berkata,”barang siapa diam akan mencapai keselamatan. Sesungguhnya berkhidmat kepada Allah itu terdiri daripada sepuluh bahagian, sembilan daripadanya terletak dalam ‘diam’. Oleh itu mereka dalam golongan ini adalah wali Allah dalam rahsia-Nya, dilindungi dan diberi keselamatan,kebijaksanaan, rakan Allah, dan diberi dengan keredhaan-Nya dan segala yang baik akan diberi kepada mereka. Oleh itu kamu hendaklah bergaul dan berkawan dengan orang-orang ini dan beri pertolongan kepada mereka. Jika kamu berbuat demikian, kamu akan dikasihi Allah dan kamu akan dipilih dan dimasukkan dalam golongan mereka yang menjadi wali dan hamba-hamba-Nya yang saleh.
Keempat: Mereka diajak ke dunia tidak nampak, diberi kemuliaan, seperti sabda Rasullullah, “barang siapa yang belajar dan mengamalkan pelajarannya dan mengajar orang lain,maka dia akan diajak ke dunia ghaib dan dipeliharkan.” Orang dalam golongan ini mempunyai ilmu-ilmu ketuhanan dan tanda-tanda Allah. Hati mereka menjadi gedung ilmu Allah yang amat berharga dan orang itu akan diberi rahsia-rahsia yang tidak diberi Allah kepada orang lain. Allah telah memilih dan membawa mereka hampir kepada-Nya. Allah akan membimbing mereka dan membawa mereka ke sisi-Nya. Hati mereka akan dilapangkan untuk menerima rahsia-rahsia dan ilmu-ilmu yang tinggi. Allah jadikan mereka itu pelaku dan lakuannya dan mengajak manusia kepada jalan Allah dan melarang membuat dosa dan maksiat. Jadilah mereka itu ‘orang-orang Allah’. Mereka mendapat bimbingan yang benar. Mereka boleh memberi pertolongan kepada orang-orang yang menuju jalan Allah. Mereka jadi orang-orang yang benar yang akan mengesahkan kebenaran orang lain. Mereka ibarat timbalan-timbalan nabi dan rasul Allah. Mereka sentiasa mendapat taufik dan hidayah daripada Allah yang Maha Agong. Orang yang dalam golongan ini adalah pada peringkat terakhir atau puncak kemanusiaan dan tidak ada makam di atas ini, kecuali kenabian. Oleh itu hati-hatilah kamu supaya jangan memusuhi dan membantah orang-orang seperti ini dan dengarlah cakap dan nasihat mereka. Oleh itu keselamatan terletak pada apa yang dicakapkan oleh mereka dan kebinasaan serta kerosakan jika di luar daripada dampingan, kecuali mereka yang Allah beri kuasa dan pertolongan terhadap hak dan keampunan.
Jadi,saya telah bahagi-bahagikan manusia kepada empat golongan. Sekarang terpulanglah kepada kamu untuk memeriksa diri kamu sendiri jika kamu mempunyai fikiran dan selamatkanlah diri kamu jika kamu ingin keselamatan. Mudah-mudahan Allah membimbing kita menuju apa yang dikasihi dan keredhaan-Nya, di dunia ini dan di akhirat kelak.
Wallahualam...

Friday, June 5, 2009

Aduh..sakitnye

Mata ku sakit :( Semalam pergi klinik and the doctor bg MC. He asked nak 1 or 2 hari but mengingatkan kerja yg banyak di ofis I only asked for 1 day and now I'm suffering.


The doctor tak sure what had caused the bengkak and it is not a ketumbit as I thought. It can be from virus, bacteria or even infection *sigh*. And in this week jer dah 2 org came to his clinic bcoz of this n total case is 5 in Ulu Kelang. Weird..


Nasib baik I went to see him if not it will getting bigger. Scary huh?? Tapi so far ok. Cuma sakit skit2 jer.


Cepat la baik mata ku!! Dah la sememangnye sepet. Bertambah sepet la mata ni.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Penyakit Ku Dtg Lagi

sakitnya kepala..adakah ni akibat tidur terlalu lama atau memang betul2 sakit?low blood dtg lagi ker? Oh no! ker sebab lain? yela,ari sabtu dah puas berjalan naik kereta ke Batu Pahat dan Melaka. Sampai rumah hampir pukul 1 pagi. pastu dengan senang lenangnya telah tido hampir setengah hari. Penat drive sorang2 ni! Tak cukup dengan sakit kepala, mata pulak kena ketumbit.

Kenapa la penyakit2 ni dtg serentak? Agak2 la.

Ketumbit ini dari ari rabu kot. Mula2 ingat bukan ketumbit. ngat sakit2 biasa bila umi cakap deny. Mane ade ketumbit kat bawah mata ye tak. Selalu kat kelopak. Mata berair. Bila kelip sakit, pegang pun sakit jugak. ntah bila intai org pun tak tau. Tak pernah pun.

Tapi rasa2 nya problem dah solve pasal pening tu. Kena pakai spek baru ok. Baru tak pening. Tu la silau tinggi ade hati nak drive mlm2 non stop w.out pakai spek. Kan dah sakit kepala. Akibatnya, buat keje, tgk tv semua kna pakai.

Browsed website, try cari petua yang boleh hilangkan ketumbit and memang ade tapi tak berani nak buat. Pakai bawang putih. Macam sakit jer. Tak pernah dengar org buat tp baca arahan pun dah naik bulu roma nak try. terima kasih jer la. Nanti tak pasal2 mata ni lagi sakit. Nasib baik mmg mata ni dah sedia ade eyebag so not so obvious la kan.

If ade sesape petua nak hilangkan dua penyakit bgtau la eh. Can't tahan anymore.

Familia :)


Happy Anniversary Umi n Ayah :).. today is their 31st Wedding Anniversary. Alhamdulllah our family's relationship getting stronger :) But we didn't go anywhere since it is weekday and tak sempat nak buat or plan apa2. But maybe Friday we will go dinner together.

I never write anything about my family in this blog before. Well, let me tell you briefly about my big happy family.

I have 7 siblings (4 brothers and 2 sisters) and I am no 4 (the middle). The unique thing about us is we were born every 2 years :) and started with A.Long in year 1979.

Currently my 2 sisters are in Australia. one is in Melbourne, Atiqah and this year is her final year and the other one is Angah in Brisbane (she will finish her study next year kot). Beside them, my 2 brothers are in Egypt. There have been there more than 5 years. I always for 4 of them to come back :(

In year 2006, A.Long married to K.Nora. My first in-law. Now they have 2 daughters, Siti Aisyah Umairah and Siti Nur Adawiyah (K.Nora is expecting to give birth to their 3rd children this July. Gender: Unknown)

So, basically, our house only left 4 of us (umi, ayah, A.Ajun and me of course).

So, there u go. A little info about my family. I always pray for their bless and happiness.

p/s: To be known soon in the picture above is referring to A.Long and K.Nora 3rd children..

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Thing That Make Me Think

Lunch..at last!!..the moment that I have been waiting for..lapar lorh today...while walking back to the office I received a call...a call that I have been waiting..dpt ker tak hny panggilan itu yang mampu memberi jawapan..

"may I speak to Ms Alia pls"

"Yes speaking"

"R u available to talk right now?"

"Yes I am"

Bla..bla..bla...

"OK, so bila Cik 'Alia boleh dtg ambil appoinment letter?"

That is all about it...I went to Bank Islam last week for an interview as Customer Service Officer..if u wonder what the position is all about..ala..org yg korang nampak wkt pergi bank yg jaga branch tu..n I got it..at Ampang Branch (thought kena campak luar KL.hahahaha..di sini juga la rezeki ku)

Actually I am not very keen to work as C.S.O bcoz tak de kena mengena dengan account..even I hate my current job it doesn't mean I want to leave it behind entirely..Marini was shocked..others biasa jer but most of them said I shouldn't accept the offer, think about what I want..komen Ruzanna yang paling panjang (hahaha..u make me think)..and some said take the appoinment letter n see what they are offering me..

During the interview, the interviwers (2 of them) considered me as being strict and garang..huh!!kasar I can accept..strict?? They even told me I was not up to their standard..teruk jugak rasanya kena dengan diorang..and I thought with that kind of responds and it is already 1 week after the interview memang ingat tak dapat..but this is what people call rezeki..yg kita tak sangka itulah yang dtg..alhamdulillah..

But now I am still considering it..ayah said go for it..umi said it is up to me..me??30%, 70%..tak kot..byk kena fikir but the possibility for me to accept memang ade..I always made decision last minute..ckp tak nak tup2 buat pulak..hehehe..will update later either I accept it or not..

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

4 am..

4 am in the morning. TV terpasang..Disney channey plak tu. Laptop pun on juga. What I am doing actually? Early in the morning. Esok keje. Cik 'Alia tak tido ker? Macam ne nak tido. Byk sangat benda dlm kepala ni. Kerja..mcm na nak buat duit lebih (short of cash..as usual)..holiday (again?? get real)..belajar.

Aduh...my work..tak siap lagi..alamak..kena buat alasan lagi ni..no!no! no! enough of excuses..get to work alia.where go all ur semangat kerja yg dulu2?? mau cari keje lain.hahaha.tapi tak de rezeki plak. lapar la pulak. no way I am going to eat anything. dalam proses mahu menurunkan berat badan.

Tadi ada org tny what do I think about his bf. Apalah as if no other ques. Answer truthfully pls...hurm...otak ni ligat berfikir bagaimana mahu menjawab soalan dengan jujur sambil menjaga hati org lain (I dont really know how to talk softly..too frank usually). To tell u the truth your bf ......... (jawapan terpaksa dirahsiakan). No further comment terus org tu logoff coz she said she's bored. Ok. Apa2 je la. Tadi minta jawapan jujur. I was being too honest kot. Sorry babe. This is life. Sometimes yg menyakitkan itu yang mengajar kita tentang kehidupan, tentang manusia yang byk hipokrit.

Peace :)

Monday, May 18, 2009

AF Final @ Bukit Jalil


tak caya...I went to Final Concert AF..hahaha...thanx to Mizan I got 2 free tickets. I drag Ruzanna along. At first I asked Mashi but her hse jauh then I asked Yana, kesian pulak dekat hsemate die yg stay alone at home.

Tak penuh pun stadium tu. But bleh thn la. I think the aura not as strong as season yg lps. Ramai student ade la. Our sit was at upper sitting. So actually ddk rmh lagi clear. It just that the sounds jer yg best.

For us yg bukan fanatic ngan AF ni (but frankly we followed it every week), tak excited sgt pun. B4 the show start, we been asked to sambung AC ckp Akademi Fantasia. Siap suruh angkat tgn lagi. But we didnt. Just duduk jer. Mmg agak bosan

Congrats to hafiz. Hafiz mmg deserve menang. Akim should b no2. Aril tu menang popularity jer. Isma n Yazid so so jer their performances. Lagu pun tak best. Lagu byk yg kita tak tau xcept lagu Adam dan Hawa. Mcm tak fair kn.

But to me AF masuk mcm saje jer buat coz if u guys realize 5th place tak de ape2 xcept for the patung tembaga bulat2 tu. If compare to AF yang dulu, sume dpt cash. sbb if tak dpt cash mcm tak de beza from yg tak masuk final. Maybe btol la kot they said AF Masuk tu for Aril coz Astro nk untung.

But watever it is, experience tgk AF Final tak de beza pun dgn ddk rmh tgk tv. Baik ddk rumah jer. Tapi dpt tiket free, amik jer la peluang kn. ;P

Friday, May 1, 2009

IQ test

I did one IQ Test that I found in the internet. it turned out to be....okay...a bit above average..I dont know that...hahaha... which 34.1% o from the total test taker got the the same score (between 115-130)..einstein's is 160++..the average score is between 85-115..try take the quiz n see which level u r..


Quick Free IQ Test
Free-IQTest.net - Quick Free IQ Test

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

U lost, I dont

Two things happened to me this few days and it's all because i'm being honest (not truly but most of the time :p). Memang la at first tu I was like what these peeps are talking about n who should I trust but lama2 when 1 people contact me and yg lain plak pn sama so its turned out to be I get to know the whole pic and i have no prob with them at all. That's the best thing kan. Even org slalu ckp dont trust people 100%, tp being transparent tak salah kn. Kita tak rugi ape2 pun as long as we being sincere. And surely the other party told lies tp tak kisah la, sakit ati tu ade tp as long everything clear should be no prob and I am glad I helped them in fixing their relationship :). Yg menipu tu nasib la. It is up to them. Malas dah nak layan!!

"Honesty is the best policy"

Monday, April 27, 2009

Happy?? I do not know




Melihat kebahagian org disekeliling aku membuatkan aku terasa seperti sunyi. Kekadang perasaan ini ingin skali mempunyai teman yang setia teman diri ini. walaupun aku takut untuk berhadapan dengan situasi itu lg tp sebagai manusia naluri untuk berkasih syg tu sentiasa ada. tak mungkin aku dpt menghindari perasaan itu.

Namun, aku bahagia apabila melihat kwn2 dan kenalan aku mengakhiri zaman bujang atau pun bertunang. Walau tak rapat tetapi melihat mereka bahagia cukup untuk mengembirakan aku. Melibatkan diri dalam persiapan itu pun sudah cukup puas (ade yg ckp..i have something wrong somewhere). Asal ada jemputan kahwin aku akan cuba tunaikan untuk menghadiri majlis itu.

Curik Tulang

Tak terkejut bila baca Berita Harian today. No wonder la all these while pesakit tunggu lama. Agak2 nye la kan brape ramai doktor yg macam ni? Brapa ramai yg tak sincere buat keje? Tau la gaji byk (if compare ngan private mmg la skit) tp tresponsibility ttp kena buat kn and I think pihak atasan memang patut buat rawatan mengejut. Read more kat bwh ni..

Dua doktor HKL ditangkap 'curi tulang'


KUALA LUMPUR: Dua doktor di jabatan kecemasan Hospital Kuala Lumpur (HKL) ditangkap 'curi tulang' semalam kerana membaca akhbar dan melakukan kerja peribadi, ketika lebih 20 pesakit menunggu untuk mendapatkan rawatan.

Kejadian berlaku kira-kira jam 10.30 pagi, ketika pesakit berkenaan yang kebanyakannya mangsa kemalangan dan berada dalam kesakitan, dikejarkan ke unit terbabit tetapi terpaksa menunggu terlalu lama untuk berjumpa doktor.

Kes curi tulang itu terbongkar apabila Timbalan Menteri Wilayah Persekutuan, Datuk M Saravanan yang kebetulan pergi ke situ untuk melawat seorang pelajar universiti yang cedera selepas dilanggar kereta yang dipandu oleh pemandu beliau.


"Saya menunggu pelajar perempuan itu mendapat rawatan dan selepas menyedari tiada seorang pun pesakit dipanggil masuk oleh doktor, saya membuka pintu bilik rawatan dan terkejut melihat seorang doktor membaca akhbar manakala seorang lagi buat hal sendiri melakukan kerja peribadi.

"Ketika itu, ada lebih 20 pesakit menunggu di luar untuk mendapat rawatan. Ini bukan cara doktor bekerja kerana pesakit sepatutnya diutamakan. Lagi pun, ini unit kecemasan yang perlu pantas memberikan rawatan," katanya.

Saravanan berkata, beliau menegur doktor terbabit kerana sikap mereka yang curi tulang ketika bekerja dan mendesak untuk berjumpa pegawai atasan mereka, tetapi terpaksa menunggu setengah jam sebelum dapat bertemunya.

"Hanya selepas itu barulah pesakit yang sudah menunggu sekian lama segera diberi rawatan. Tak bolehkah doktor itu melayani pesakit dulu? Ini bukan cara perkhidmatan yang sepatutnya di hospital kerajaan," katanya.

Perdana Menteri, Datuk Seri Najib Razak, dalam satu daripada lawatan mengejutnya ke ibu negara kelmarin berkata, beliau mahu barisan hadapan institusi kerajaan di pusat bandaraya supaya meningkatkan perkhidmatan kepada rakyat.

Saravanan berkata, sungguhpun beliau 'menangkap' doktor terbabit secara tidak sengaja, beliau akan kerap melakukan lawatan mengejut ke jabatan di bawah kementeriannya bagi memastikan kakitangan di barisan hadapan melaksanakan tugas mereka kepada masyarakat.

"Ini adalah pembuka mata. Kami sebagai pemimpin tidak boleh hanya menabur janji saja tetapi tidak memeriksa sama ada ia dibuat kakitangan kerajaan di barisan hadapan. Kami mesti turun memastikan penyelesaian segera.

"Apatah lagi dalam keadaan ini apabila orang sedang sakit dan menanggung penderitaan akibat kesakitan itu. Jika mereka tidak sakit, mereka tidak akan datang ke unit kecemasan. Ini adalah pengajaran untuk semua hospital," katanya. - Bernama

Thursday, April 23, 2009

He's Just NOT That Into You


Last wed me,mashi and Anizah went to Times Square after work to watched a movie since Mashi's dad will pick her up quite late that day. we decided to watch this movie coz the title it self is catchy and my sister who had watched this movie recommends it so that we the ladies would know what actually in guy's head.

I am not 100 % agree with the movie nor 100% disagree. Coz for me in the relationship it is all depends on us. The exceptional is for you to decide not the guy. But the part where a Alex realized that he had fall for a Giegie when she stopped contacting him, I cannot deny more. It is always like that in the real life notwithstanding for a guy or a girl.

further, if we realize, we tend to overreact when we paranoid.Just like Janine and her husband. U love that someone but because of something bad happened in ur past sometimes can make urself hurt ur partner. Even it is true that ur partnet is wrong but there is a better way for u to overcome the situation. But I always don't understand why must u find a replacement when u actually not trying to fix the prob. Ok...just look at Janine, they obviously have a major prob in their marriage (they never have sex life) but the guy easily fall in love with Anna and slept with her. But the funny part is when Janine found out and mad that her husband cheated about the scandal but not as mad as when she found that he's smoking.

Then there is an issue when Beth wanna get marry badly but her bf didn't coz he didn't belives in marriage where he believes that they can still live happy together. But he said he loves her. Loves but dont want to get marry. Ape la. But same as Alex, he realized that he wants to spend his whole life with and only Beth when they broke off.

Another story is about Mary. Mary is a friend to Anna. She is in process to find the Right Man. However, the problem is when most of the guy that she knows is through the internet. So not healthy r.ship if u ask me. Internet nowdays is used as an alternative for a person to widen their so called community. But she never met him. So, how does she knows that he's the one. Trust me it is hard when u r in the virtual relationship. No phone calls at all. No emotion (the emoticons do not count) involves. And the most important no personal in touch.

Surely, the story ended with a happy ending. Nvrtheless, we have to remember prob occurs in a r.ship not bcause only one side but both sides are playing the important role. It is us to decide whether it is good or bad for us.

I recommend this story for those who haven't watch the movie. Just for fun and learn from it if it is applicable to u.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Cinta ker???








Mencintai dan menyanyagi seseorg yg kita pernah berjumpa walau sekali adalah tidak mustahil..aku percaya pada cinta pandangan pertama…byk kali perkara ini berlaku…waktu skolah dl ia boleh dianggap sebagai ‘crush’ tp bila perkara ini terjadi sekarang aku tidak lagi menganggap perasaan itu hny suka tp cinta dan sayang …walau hny di alam siber kami berjumpa dgn tidak pernah dgr suara tetapi siapa sangka pertemuan 15 minit sebelum itu boleh mengubah perasaan..btol la kata org dr mata jatuh ke hati…

Ade org yg beranggapan selepas putus cinta akibat di tipu amat sukar utk mencari penganti…aku tidak percaya kerana bg aku kita semua telah ditakdirkn akan berjumpa dengan pasangan masing2.. Cuma kita tidak tahu bila dan di mana..mane tahu jodoh kita adalah org yg selalu kita jumpa di dalam LRT atau pun sahabat sendiri (aku harap ini tidak akan berlaku)…bg aku perpisahan dulu adalah kerana tidak ade jodoh..bak kata mak aku kita kena percaya pada konsep jodoh…kalau tidak susah nnt…

Namun..sampai bila perasaan syg ini akan kekal? Org yg berkahwin berpuluh2 tahun sehingga rambut berubah dari hitam ke putih pn boleh bercerai…tapi aku???yg hny berjumpa di alam siber..sekadar hai,hai,bye,bye..macam mana la agaknya…bolehkah perasaan ini kekal lama…aku mengharapkan ia akan berkekalan tapi…..argh…kalo cakap skarang tak de maknanya…aku tau mungkin aku hanya bertepuk sebelah tangan sebab itu aku tidak mengharap apa2 dari perhubungan ini melainkan persahabatan kami kekal…



Ada beberapa kali aku cakap ayat ini ‘no one can attract my attention..i don’t see any guy that can make me say he’s handsome, smart or good looking anymore…but only him..’..aduh…teruk jugakkan bila pikir balik tapi disebabkan aku pun malas nak pikir hal2 berkaitan dengan cinta… aku sudah puas menangis,ditipu,dihina,ditinggalkan.. aku sekarang lebih berhati2..apa yg berlaku pernah berlaku benar2 mengajar aku siapa ‘LELAKI’..dengan pengalaman mereka yg aku sayangi lagi ditambah pula kritikan pedas oleh seseorg yg mengatakan aku amat mudah utk menerima lelaki walau hny berkenalan tidak lama..maka kini aku berpegang pada prinsip ‘ignorance is a bliss’ :-)


Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Rimas....

tetiba today I feel so rimas...argh...work loads..my sisters' things...gosh..a few days to go before I'm going to Melbourne to see my beloved sisters but things still hvn't done yet...makin lama makin byk la brg yg kena beli..I think btol la my bag will full with their stuff...

A lot of things that I'm thinking right know...should I apply new work? There are a few vacancies that I am considering right now..nk update resume yg malas ni..money always become an issue to me lately...coz now I am broke buying them stuff...another reason to change work...

but hey...since I will b taking a week off I'm quite ok with it...so far I still can handle this pressure at work...think again about work...I just answered 'How much u hate or love ur work' quiz..and the answer....ehem..I TOTALLY HATE my job..hahaha...I think its time for me to apply for a new job eventhough mayb middle of this yr there will b another assesment but the motivation is not there anymore...if you ask me do I like what I'm doing right now my answer would be Im fine with it..neutral..neither hate nor like...but I hate the env here...the people..urgh...if u read my post about the meeting mayb u have some idea wat's going on here...

Do pray for me ya for my future..and everything go well as I plan...amin...

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Nice smile with the great teeth

lagu Lucky dendangan Jason Mraz berbunyi di telefon ku menandakan ade msg yg baru diterima. Owhh...Laila rupa nye. Msg nya berbunyi begini: "dh pakai braces. sgt hodoh"..welcome to da club Laila. Bertambah lagi sorg kwn aku yg pki braces. Terngat balik zaman aku memakainya 8 thn lps (yes ppl..that's why I have a teratur teeth..hahaha). Dan skarg patut pki retainer tp malas + app card dah hilang.

Sewaktu aku memakai braces dulu tak ramai yg pakai lg. Skarg dh mcm ala-ala trend plak. in less than 3 month rasa2 mcm 3 org kawan aku yg pakai. Tak pe nak lawa punya psl. Bg yg tak penah rasa and bakal merasa pakai braces ni, let me tell u, sakit gile mula2 pakai. rasa mcm nk tercabut gigi tu. makan tu tak bleh,ini tak bleh. yg keras lagi la. Dah la aku pakai 2 days kot b4 raya..hahaha...mmg kena pantang la makan wkt raya. tapi aku blasah jer sume. first day lagi dah makan kacang goreng. hehehe.. Ade beberapa perkara menarik yg berlaku sepanjang 2 thn aku pki braces.

  1. my cousin pukul/tumbuk or wateva yg bleh dipggl 2 days after aku pakai. bertambah sakit n aku menangis. nasib skit jer. she spoiled my day actually
  2. ade bdk yg melihat aku ala2 mcm alien. siap pggl abg die nk tunjuk gigi aku..so funny.. wat can i do besides smiling back at them :)
  3. every month pegi appoinment jarang kalo tak de org temankn..slalunyer ruzanna yg teman. I think bcoz she liked to look at my braces. ntah ape yg special pn tak tau. bila tny die juz jwb "i juz like to look at it"
  4. lps pegi appoinment bleh meronggeng kat KLCC sbb bangunan yg aku pg tu sbelah jer KLCC. Bangunan Angkasa Raya. I still remember ade skali tu aku n laila pegi mkn BR. kaya sungguh kami.
  5. I will choosed appointment ari Jumaat coz that day blk awal. Then esok cuti. seronok nye..pastu pakai bj seragam. takde sape tau kitaorg skolah ape dl. mmg la ppl will pandang lain mcm tp wat the heck. tak kisah pn.
  6. org lain kena makan roti,bubur or ape2 yg lembut dlm masa semggu lps pakai. Aku??kuih, rendang,kuah kacang..name it..i juz ate. ask me how i can ate those thing tp aku tak tau. tak kunyah kot. org lain kurus bila pakai tp aku tak maintain jer.
  7. first week pki kena ulser berlambak.then the dr. gv me sumthg yellowish to tampal kat besi2 tu so that tak bergesel ngan my bibir. sakit sgt.
  8. few times trtelan getah kecik2 tu. getah2tu utk cptkn pros rapatkn the space between teeth.coz mls nk cabut kot.getah tu still aku simpan.mcm2 color ade.
  9. my dentist, Dr David, always puji me i hv a great structure n i take care of my braces well. Ayah ckp mmg la die puji coz his money gak yg melayang masuk poket Dr. David but i admit that he is nice tak kasar mayb wkt bukak n ketatkn the wire jer kot.
  10. everytime dtg appointment wire akan diketatkn.guna player. n makin lama makin tebal wire tu. makin sakit jdk nye.usually i dont eat the whole day after pg appoinment.
  11. i miss i braces. i like to wear it coz i feel diff. now im suppose to wear a retainer. it more complicated than braces. aku hny berthn for 2 yrs jer after that masuk UM dh tak teratur. ade niat nk pg buat retainer blk coz gigi kita sentiasa bergerak, so i dont want itto b back to normal. mahal la nk buat skarg. rm5k.see how,when i have the time.hehehe...
according to my siz, org yg pki braces ni kalo tdo or trjg the gigi will ade satu sound mcm bergesel.aku pn tak tau btol ker tak since i'm the one yg tdo. n if u wear bfore ur baby tooth tumbuh, bersedialah utk mnghadapi satu lagi penyakit. which is bila gigi bongsu tu tumbuh msti something wrong will happen and kna buat surgery like me. which costed me a lot.

so to those yg br pakai n niat nk pakai..welcome to the club..love to see those smile..with the great teeth.. :)

Thursday, February 5, 2009

A New Kind Of Date Rape

Casual hookups, mixed signals, and alcohol play a part in a confusing form of sexual assault. Here, everything you need to know about what some people call gray rape.

While I'm searching something at cosmopolitan.com, i came across this interesting article/story, New Kind Of Date Rape. A true story in fact which make me think that the case would not happen if we can control ourselves. So, who us to blame? and who should we blame when this thing happen to us?

You can read more here.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

A Boring Dept Meeting

hurm...early this morning we had a dept meeting with marilyn. As usual nothing much that had been discussed in the meeting except to update our status on the cases that we r handling and some others. Well, since one of the management account hasn't come in so I do not hv any job to do (well..actually I have tp skit jer nk kna finalise jer), Marilyn put me as asst to Pei Yee one of the senior. I dont mind working with her but the reactions from some of the colleagues made me annoyed. They laughed. Somekind of laugh which I knoe ade makna disebalik ketawa itu. I just ignored by talking to Mashi. Nasib baik Mashi ade..die tmpt cover gak.

When we went to our place Marini came to me and asked me if I realized that they laughed just now and I said yes. But I said I dont care wat they thinking but I think I know why and I have my own reason why I acted like that. Just to defend myself from been blame for something I didn't do. Honestly, I feel like resingning from my job. The environment is not the same as before plus with others issues. But I'm stuck. If I want to find another job and with current econ I noe it's hard for me to get a new job. Plus, I have my own plan which I know if I resign my parents will be so mad.

I'm a slow learner. I'm still trying to cope with this job eventhough audit is not my interest. I need to bertahan as long as I can.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

I'm Confuse

Maybe wat im thinking is wrong but it might be correct..I just read his wall and there is one comment from a girl that make me ques about his status..btol ke die still single??in the comment there are few words yg membuatkan ku musykil such as:

mmg kalo dilihat secara kasar mcm tak de ape2..bak kata isma ala...ade jer org prmpn pggl bf org lain syg..honey n etc..n according to her mane tau the girl jenis yang mcm tu kn...hopefully isma btol...she really confident on what she said..kalo tak btol u r the first one yg aku akan cr...

but if btol die dh berpunya as usual i will back off like i always did..furthermore,ade one of my fren yg risik about us to him..n he said our r.ship biase2 jer (which i cant agree more
) and he contactedt me if die sunyi..looks like i am his last person on earth bila tak de sape utk die hubungi..terasanye...tp isma ckp jugak...sunyi can bring 2 meanings...positive and negetive.

positive when:
  • dalam erti kata lain die rindu (hahaha..as if he missed me la)

negetive when:
  • die bosan dan tak de sape2 maka aku menjadi pilihannya
Hopefully yg positive la sbb kalo yg positive mmg 110% i will b so happie :) gerenti senyum tak lekang for a few weeks...ahax..

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Iklan Mentos Tak Jdk

Last friday(23 Jan 2009) i walked alone to LRT since k.salina went back early and k.ina pn cabut agak awal. I dont mind walking alone actually even the distance from Jamek to my office almost 30min..nasib baik dah biasa berjalan since skola.

Sedang berjalan sambil berangan2 tetiba aku terasa sumthing wrong dgn kasut yg aku pki..tetiba kasut aku jdk rendah sebelah. dalam hati tertny..alamak..apsal plak ni...aku toleh ke belakang.aku ternampak ade sesuatu yg ukurannya dlm 1inci berwrn hitam..ade beberapa pejalan kaki di sekeliling ku pn melihat bnd yg sama..

"alamak..my heel,"kataku dlm hati.

dgn keadaan yg cuak dn agak malu...aku menefon k.ana.

"k.ana still kat ofis ker?"aku bertny.

"aah.knape?"

"pkl brape k.ana blk?sy ngat nak suruh bwkkn selipar sy kat bwh meja,"

"knape?alia kat mane?"

"heel kasut sy patah.saya kat Menara Olympia,"jwb ku dgn tenang. Menara Olympia kalo diikutkn btwen Jamek and ofis ku mengambil masa lbh kurang 10 min.

"boleh la.tp tggu pkl 7.boleh?"jwb k.ana.

terus aku menoleh ke arah jam tgn. lg 45min nk tggu..tak sggp dgn takde tmpt ddk n org lalu lalang..lalu aku menagmbil keputusan utk tidak menunggu k.ana.setelah aku memerah otakutk menyelesaikn masalah aku teringat iklan mentos dahulu kala mengenai seorg wanita yg keadaannya sama seperti ku.aku rasa ok gak nk buat mcm die..patahkn heel lagi satu..br balance.

aku berjalan a few steps n berhenti di CIMB (sbb situ tak ramai org)..unfortunately i cant do like wat the girl in the advertistment did coz the heel attach together with the tapak..then i juz walked while thinking wat to do next since i cant patahkn the other heel.

Otak ku berputar mencari jln menyelesaikan masalah ini.Nasib baik ade Gurdian store dekat2 sini. Nak tak nak aku ke sana dgn kasut yg sebelah tinggi sebelah rendah. Sampai di Guardian, aku terus ke ting atas mencari selipar yg agak menarik utk di beli. Takde plak yg ok. Yang tggl wrn biru and kuning. Erkk..kuning..no way. biru??mencapap la plak. Tapi aku tau aku tak de pilihan melainkan beli jer ape yg ade. Aku membuat keputusan utk membeli selipar yg berwrn biru. Biru pn biru la dr wrn kuning.

Setelah membyr hrg selipar tersebut aku ke tepi tembok utk tukar. setelah menoleh ke kiri dan ke kanan beberapa kali bg memastikan tiada sapa yg perasaan, aku dgn cpt2 memakai selipar tersebut. Maka, aku pulang dgn LRT memakai selipar berwarn biru yg berharga RM6.99 pd ari tu.Sungguh selekeh!!

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Tell Him by Celine Dion

This is one of my fav song that sang by Celine Dion (she's superb and has amazing voice) together with Barbara Streisand. This song really represent my feeling for him :)

TELL HIM (Celine Dion)

I'm scared
So afraid to show I care
Will he think me weak
If I tremble when I speak
Oooh - what if
There's another one he's thinking of
Maybe he's in love
I'd feel like a fool
Life can be so cruel
I don't know what to do

I've been there
With my heart out in my hand
But what you must understand
You can't let the chance
To love him pass you by

Should I

Tell him
Tell him that the sun and moon
Rise in his eyes
Reach out to him
And whisper
Tender words so soft and sweet
Hold him close to feel his heart beat
Love will be the gift you give yourself

Touch him
With the gentleness you feel inside
Your love can't be denied
The truth will set you free
You'll have what's mean to be
All in time you'll see

I love him
Of that much I can be sure
I don't think I could endure
If I let him walk away
When I have so much to say

I'll

Love is light that surely glows
In the hearts of those who know
It's a steady flame that grows
Feed the fire with all the passion you can show
Tonight love will assume its place
This memory time cannot erase
Blind faith will lead love where it has to go

Never let him go

If it is as easy as this song for me to tell my feeling then tak la skarg i'm in doubt.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Me, myself and an essay

it's almost 12am but still I haven't finish my essay..let me c..3 lines...gosh..i promise ruz to give her by today to proof read (ruz..i am so sorry if i make u waiting)...i really have no idea what to write and crap about..the topic is about me, my career prospect and plan in further my study..its sound easy but it is not that easy..trust me...hahaha...

however, i know i have to do this coz i've done 1/3 from the process..rugi la plak kalo stop kat sini jer kn..n this is one way for me to prove that i'm worth and i deserve more than i have. some of u might know why i have to do the essay...support me will u (dah hampir putus asa gak tp nasib baik umi bagi support..thanx umi)..

2morrow i will go to career fair at mid...harap2 ade yg bleh tolong diri ini yg sungguh blur n pening ni..haih..btw to anyone yg intrested to go to the career fair u can get further info here.