I am blessed...Alhamdulillah

I wrote this few months back when people asked why I decided to do kenduri kesyukuran

Solo trip: not even a bit of the story

I am suppose to start writing about my trip to UK tonight. But until now I am still transferring pictures to my external hard disk. It will takes days by looking at the number of pictures that I took using my phone. This is all thanks to Capture app. I saved all pictures in the app and do not know how to transfer it to the pc (thanks to my not-so-intelligent-IT-apps-understanding too).

By the way, the write up about the trip also will take few days. I have to recall all the memories. But insha Allah, will make it happen (yeay!). Someone asking me to write it all so that he can copy my itinerary and I said he has to wait until next year (I hope not). I will force myself to make it done by this month. In fact, at least the story about my first ever solo trip will not be forgotten by myself right?

p/s: I have few overdue posts about what happened in year 2015. *sigh

Dislike the post

Assalamualaikum. 

Last weekend memang our house full coz most of the siblings were here with the family. So rumah yg selalunya sunyi jadi 'havoc' dengan suara budak2 gelak. We were talking about names then my eldest niece ckp in her class ada 4 org nama AIsyah. Nurul Nur Aisyah, Nur Aisyah then ada sorang ni that her nama memang menarik perhatian because her name is Aisyah but people called her Bella budak hot. I was like 'apa, budak hot?'. The reason is because she got followers laki more than perempuan dalam twitter. So I  searched her in twitter (skodeng time..ehem..). Twitter tak private, followers berlambak almost 2000++. fuh! scroll tgk gambar, read the tweets. Basically budak ni tak tweet pun. byk tweets because of the followers statistic. Gambar byk selfie with muka ala2 comel.

Actually bukan nak cakap pasal ni but i want to write about social media. As we know Malaysian is top 5 to have social media account. so you can imagine hebat tak hebat rakyat malaysia dalam up to date pasal benda2 ni. Memang tak surprise la if budak sekolah rendah pun ada account FB, Twitter or IG. I don't mind psl tu tapi wat makes me menyampah is the pictures they posted. Selfie muka ala2 comel tu dah biasa sgt but gambar half naked. i fell sad for them,the parents. I am wondering, parents diorg tak tau ke. Pastu like 100 n mostly lelaki. Saddest part is yang liked and post gambar are Islam, melayu. And God knows if ada org yg just save our picture in their phone. Have we ever think about it? Trust me it happens. Gambar yang bertudung pun ada org nak save, gambar yang tak bertudung? Think about it please.

Sumpah, sometimes nak nangis tengok their picture especially yg kita kenal. I just pray for them, to realise that this world is more to explore, this world is fulls with cabaran, that their life is a long way to go. Another thing that makes me sad is org yg comment or likes are those yang ada blood related or best friend. Shouldn't a good friend/person tegur if they really love them? Kesian dengan parents mereka. Mereka masih muda. They have potential tapi I don't want them to be successful person tapi gaya macam ni. I have been through my teenage life and I regret few things I did. I don't want them to regret in their future like me. I pray that someone could lead them to straight path.

Takut dengan dunia sekarang. Teenagers selamber letak pictures mcm2. Dulu nak post pikir dua tiga kali even parents bukan dalam friend list. I know u didn't wear hijab but please jgn letak gambar yg nampak hampir segala-galanya. Tak manis!

At this point, I am bersyukur sebab my niece tak ada any media social account. At least she listens to her mother. I always tell her 'tak payah ada account FB ke IG ke'.

I am not married and I am afraid if I have a child, could I raise them properly? Penuh dengan kasih sayang, Islamic knowledge in this horror world? I hope I can when I have one :)

aci?

Terlalu ramai yang buat statement and tanya soalan di bawah. So this will be my script.

Aci?

P/s: some questions shouldn't be asked coz we have no answer for that.

Ini kalilah, Lain kalilah, Apa-apa jelah

Assalamualaikum.

I'm not sure how to start this. Ok, firstly, results GE13 semua kita dah tau and this time memang buat sejarah. Perang in social media, mass media. Tiap2 hari kat timeline either Twitter or FB mesti ada pasal election. Kalau dulu guna bendera, posters, bunting but since masyarakat Malaysia dah celik IT maka media sosial pula digunakan as medium utk berkempen. 

This post is not to comment who won or who lost in the election but the purpose I write is because I am sad/ sick of the people who commented and shared in social media. Bahasa kasar, carut-mencarut, maki-memaki. Few days before the day of election, I told my friend 'dah tak sabar nak tunggu 5 Mei 2013 sebab I just couldn't bear to read/ listen to the comments.' I don't mind people share info tapi kenapa sampai tak de adab? Mana pegi akal dan iman bila tulis and bagi statement. 

Now, after 2days, timeline still penuh dengan GE13. Demam post-GE. Statistik, pendapat/ ulasan from ahli akedemik, individu semua ade tak kisahlah from which side. I read both. I analyse and still analyzing the information. Saya tak nak tgk siapa yang tulis tp i want to know the point. 

But, this time around, timbul soal racism aka 'tsunami cina' or whatever they called it. Today (7th May 2013), Utusan Malaysia punya title front page 'Apalagi Cina mahu?' dan 'Mereka amat racis-Ali Rustam'  menimbulkan situasi tak senang. Baik for the chinese, Malay or other races. 

Sabda Nabi saw:

"Wahai manusia! Sesungguhnya tuhan kamu sama, bapa kamu sama (Adam). Ketahuilah! Tiada kelebihan orang arab ke atas 'ajam (yang bukan arab) atau 'ajam ke atas arab, atau yang berkulit merah ke atas yang berkulit hitam, atau yang berkulit hitam ke atas yang berkulit merah melainkan ketakwaan" (Riwayat Ahmad dan al- Baihaqi, dinilai hasan oleh al-Albani)

Personally I would say that mass media plays an important role to unite the Malaysian because what they published would take as a reliable source. Orang akan terima fakta tanpa buat kajian di sebaliknya. Tanyalah makcik2, pakcik2 or parents kita yang memang tak exposed to internet, what source do they have to get information? They will answer from television and newspapers mainly. Tapi kalau dah headline and ayat yang digunakan tu boleh disalahtafsir and kelak membawa kepada kehancuran, macam mana? Moreover, it came from a mainstream newspaper. I know, media ni sometimes diorang nak dapat attention so they create bombastic punya headline or manipulate what people said when being interviewed. Choose your words carefully. Dari benda yang sekecil zarah kalau disalah tafsir and disalah lapor akan jadi sebesar dinosaur tau. Dari benda yang tak da lah apa2 sangat boleh membawa kepada satu kehancuran.

Same goes with kita orang biasa. Your words can harm others and can worsen the current situation. As a muslim, saya percaya kita semua tau yang Islam cintakan keamanan, menolak racism. Kenapa mesti ada sifat macam tu dalam diri? Cukuplah maki-memaki dan membuka aib orang sebelum PRU, kenapa perlu ada episod seterusnya? 

"The media's the most powerful entity on earth. They have the power to make the innocent guilty and to make the guilty innocent, and that's power. Because they control the minds of the masses."- Malcom X.

Saya malu dan sedih sebab kita maki org Islam juga. (sobs!) Kita tunjuk sifat buruk kita kat bukan Islam macam mana non-Muslim nak terima agama kita? nak gunapakai undang-undang Islam? Each of us has our own part. Be honest when you do your role. 

Yang kalah stop pointing at others. Reflect yourself, what you have done wrong. Perbaiki, buat strategi balik Kalau anda memang ikhlas bertanding untuk memperbaiki negara dan agama, Allah swt akan permudahkan. Mungkin your time hasn't come. You might thing you are ready which actually you are not. Teruskan berjuang kerana perjuangan yang ikhlas dan benar akan diberi kemenangan oleh Allah swt.

Lastly, bacalah juga non-mainstream newspaper or listen to independent source supaya kita boleh tau pro and cons sesuatu benda. And if your thoughts are wrong accept, buat kajian, read more. Be matured. 

Saya seorang Muslim. Saya cintakan keamanan dan keadilan. Saya tolak racism.

Saya ada kawan cina, india dan macam2 lagi selain melayu dan saya ikhlas berkawan dengan mereka.

Maaflah jika ada yang tersinggung bila baca apa yang saya tulis ni. This is my personal view. Saya insan yang  kerdil. Banyak lagi saya tak tau. 

Yang baik itu datang dari Allah swt dan yg buruk itu dari saya sendiri.

Wassalam.

Changed

Alhamdulillah. It is all I can say when I got to know my friend starts wearing hijab. From my experiences, they had the intention long before they wearing it and I am glad that they made up their mind to wear hijab permanently. I admit, they look more beautiful. 

Maybe ada orang yg not wearing a hijab yet pikir 'I'm not good enough' or 'Ala, kalau pakai tudung tapi buat dosa juga, takde different pun'. Yes, it is true indeed. Berhijrah bukan senang especially if you are surrounded with community yang judgemental or suka cakap belakang or berkawan dengan orang yang memang tak pakai hijab. Tapi niat yang ikhlas yang baik akan dipermudahkan oleh Allah swt and honestly when you wear a hijab slowly and automatically you feel embarrassed to do all the benda yang tak elok sebab eventually you will feel that you are obligated to jaga your tatatertib and cara pemakaian. 

Family mainkan peranan penting. Give your spouse/ daughter encourage to wear it. Tak perlu nak perli2 sebab bila perli manusia akan sakit hati, bila sakit hati orang tak nak ikut. Buat rugi je. 

Honestly, when I started to wear I still wear short or 3/4 sleeves, selimpang tinggi, and ada time bila around rumah tak pakai pun. But as time past by, slowly I changed, lengan panjang, tak nak baju ketat or pendek, labuhkan tudung (tapi kadang2 terlepas jugak). I also try to control my words and perangai. 

So, tak perlulah nak pikir banyak sebab as a Muslimah we have to cover our aurah and kita masih boleh lagi berfesyen.

And yes, I feel safe when I am covered :) 

I really hope one day org yang saya sayang akan pakai hijab coz you are prettier when you wear it :)

Different Path

Salam.

Pernah tak korang terfikir yang korang akan kerja lain dari apa yang korang tengah study dulu? Mestilah takkan. How about now? Ever thinking to change your career path? I never think doing something which is not related what I studied. Never cross my mind.

But after almost 5 years working, I changed my mind. I got a friend who has degree in Science Computer and now she's working at Real Estate unit, arranging branches, new properties of the company. No related education background to what she's doing right now. Of course there is no specific reason for a person to choose different path but it has related to do with minat and kecenderungan or just because that is the only job that being offered that so they just go with the flow.

Basically I think it depends dekat minat masing2. Degree is just a stepping stone sebab if you are not interested what your doing believe me you won't enjoy your working life (part of it). If everyday you feel nak muntah to repeat the job then get out of there. But my friend said if you want to change your career path do it while you are young. How young is young? Before 30 years old and jangan pulak pegi tukar keje which is totally different except you want to make your own business or run a family business. There are works that maybe you just a need a tiny small related experiences or education or senang nak belajar that you're interested in doing. 

Think about it again :)

P/S: I still love what I am doing and I have no intention to change my path yet. 

Losing my touch

I lost my touch. I don't know how to blogging anymore. *sigh*

I just need to write

I have been thinking about this for the past few months and I really need to write about what I'm thinking. So, here you go....

When we chose someone to get married and be our lifetime partner there must be a reason to it. It might be because his heart/ money/ wealth/ looks or etc. For me if I choose that somebody to be my partner I don't based on his physical appearance. Honestly for me when it's about your lifetime partner it has to be beyond that.

Not everyone is perfect and we all knew it and we couldn't get the person we dream off. A guy I am with right now is not the type of person that I though I will end up with. He's an average guy who owns a 'motor kapcai', lives in a kampung (in KL) with family, doesn't care what brand is he wearing and earns less than RM5K. Though sometimes he can drives me crazy like sooooo demmmm crazy I still stick to him. Even I can't rely on him 100% though I am so desperate for a hand, I still close my option.

What I am trying to say is there must be a reason why we chose to have them as a life partner. And I chose him because he has something that nobody that I have met have. He treated me well, he knows how to handle me when I'm having life crisis, he criticised if I make any mistake, I am comfortable with him and he makes me to be a better person.

One time when I told someone that my ex-admirer is getting married and well earned, that person asked me why I didn't choose him. I said I can't. Yes, he's earning good money, educated, have good job but I am not comfortable with him and sometimes the relationship can't be more than friend (it just can't even you force it to happen).

My friend is a perfectionist but she end up with mummy little boy. Another friend who can easily get grumpy, moody end up with choosy and perfectionist. I always believe there is a reason Allah sent that person to us. To teach us how to be grateful and improve ourselves to be a better person in another word "dialah seteru kita, yg kita ingat selama ini kita memang tak suka dgn perangai org jenis mcm ini. Tapi org itulah yg ajar kita what is the meaning of life".

And me, a hot-tempered and annoying got a guy who always test my patience and from that I learn how to control my temper not only when it caused by him but also by others. I know we complement each other in some way. Someone said this to me: "itu keburukan dia dan kau kena belajar untuk terima. Dan kau juga at the same time kena belajar untuk jadi seorg penyabar. Bukan dgn dia je tapi dgn benda lain juga".

I always wonder before why you have to end up with 'kaki clubbing' or 'org yg control your every says and actions' while they know they couldn't tolerate that behaviour. There must be a reason, a reason that you couldn't express the so called X-factor (s) when you were asked. Only us and Him and also him/her (by any chance) know the real reason.

I'm not writing this to make you understand how I am feeling but at least before you judge and say, think if we are wearing the same shoes.

p/s: wealthy is not permanent. Our charity is. What we earned today is enough unless we are being ungrateful.

Exam!

Registration - not yet and I missed the early bird discount

Study - not even half

Class - not sure to take or not

I am super dead!

Tick tock the exam is on 18th June 2012. Mark my calendar with big red marker pen.

how I feel for this 24hours

this is how i feel for the past 24hours.

1) nervous

2) hatred

3) ashame

4) sad

5) depress

6) worried

7) guilty

8) extra careful

9) double guilty

10) unsure

11) greatful

12) blur

13) happy

14) blessed

15) double triple angry

16) 10 times more sad n dissapointed

17) now i am hurt emotionally and physically but no one including them bother to ask.

Update!

It has been truly a long time tak update anything in this blog.

Well, there are few things happened to me for this year:

1. Abg Ajun kahwin
2. Went to Brisbane to visit angah with my friends
3. Change work. This time the company is waayyyyy much better than my previous company and I really like it :)
4. Went to Bandung
5. Atiqah is married

Tak de la menarik sangat pun. Tapi those are important things that happened to me.

3 Different People

When I walked to the office this morning, I saw few different people:

1. A cute baby in the car and she (I guess is a she) waved at me. How adorable.
2. A couple. A girl and a tomboy (I don't dare to say she is a penkid).
3. A lady who turned out to be a guy actually. Hahaha. 'She' has adam's apple when I looked closely. 'She' even dyed 'her' hair. A glare and you could assume that he is a she.

That is why I love walking. I can see so many things and so many behavior.

Surat Kepada Pemandu

Kepada semua pemandu (kereta, motosikal, basikal, lori, truck dan lain2 jenis kenderaan),

Sila beri laluan kepada kenderaan lain jika anda ingin meletakkan kenderaan di hadapan, belakang, kiri atau kanan kenderaan tersebut. Jika anda desperate hendak meletak kenderaan tetapi tidak mempunyai ruang di harap berfikir sebelum memakir kenderaan anda. Ini kerana anda mungkin telah dan akan menghalang kenderaan yg berada di hadapan, belakang, kiri dan kanan anda daripada hendak memandu keluar dari tempat parkir.

Adalah sungguh menyeksakan dan ‘irritating’ pabila pemandu tersebut ingin memandu keluar. Adakah anda mahu pemandu lain honk kan kenderaan mereka semata-mata ingin mendapat perhatian anda? Bagaimana pula jikalau pemandu itu mempunyai hal yang penting (isteri nak terberanak, mengambil exam dan sbgnya)? Silap-silap mereka terpaksa melepaskan peluang hanya kerana perangai anda yang terlalu mementingkan diri utk sebuah tempat parkir.

Jika pemandu itu mempunyai tahap kesabaran yg nipis, maunya anda mendapat nota dari kekasih dengan lambang tanduk, kata2 maki hamun atau yg paling teruk jika ada satu garisan panjang sebagai hiasan di tepi kenderaan anda (nak cat balik kena berate jugak!). Jika pemandu tersebut bernasib baik, manusia yang lalu lalang akan menolong mengalihkan kenderaan anda. Itu kalau motor. Kalau kenderaan adalah kereta, truck besar atau lori bagaimana? Sungguh menyusahkan!

Jadi, sebelum buat sesuatu silalah fikir pasal orang lain. Jangan pentingkan diri sendiri. Kita hidup nak kena share apa yang ada terutamanya kalau hak awam. Give and take okie sebab saya penulis nota ini sudah 2,3 kali kenderaan di halang oleh motosikal. Sungguh mencabar keimanan. Nasib baik ada manusia prihatin. Terima kasih kepada yang membantu.

Sekian, terima kasih.

Yg Benar,
…………………………….

Octopus Membuat Ramalan

Demam World Cup memang melanda semua orang. Those yang tak suka, or tak follow football before this pun mesti follow World Cup. It almost towards the end of the game. We already know which teams go to the final this Monday (2.30am).

The match between Spain and Germany memang ditunggu-tunggu. Some said it will be the most interesting match (me too but not that interesting) and some said they should meet at Final not Semi-final. Apa nak buat. But Spain won the game with 1-0.

But the most interesting topic for the match is Paul the octopus' prediction. Before the match it predicted that Spain will and it turned out to be 100% correct. It same goes with previous prediction. Oh yeah, Paul is at Germany if some of you might not know.

It only a prediction. Tak sangka pula it turned out to be betol. Ramai percaya but not me (berdosa percaya benda karut nih). Lepas ni Paul kena masak bagi makan kat pasukan German sebab ramalan dia tepat. But I wonder if it can predict correctly for the final. Hurmm...

I Am Sorry

I am sorry for not being a good friend...
I am sorry for not being there when u need me...
I am sorry for not being a good partner..

I am sorry for not being a good colleague..
I am sorry for not being a good employee...

I am sorry for not being a good sister...
I am sorry for not being a good daughter..

but the worst is..

I am sorry for not being a devoted and a good Muslim..

Am I being a hypocrite and liar all this while???

Movie After Exam

Habis je exam I went to watch The Storm Warriors. Planned nak tgk pkl 9pm but since we reached there late (hujan that nite) so we changed to 10pm punya show.

Memang excited nak tgk movie ni at first place coz The Storm Riders dulu2 best sgt2. First time tengok Storm Riders hati dah terpikat. I can watch it over and over again. So, bila The Storm Warriors keluar, excited coz I wanna know what happen next to Wind and Cloud. If I'm not mistaken this movie is from a comic (I'm not sure which one coz I'm not fancy of any of it).

To me, the movie is not like what I expected. Nak kata bosan tak la jugak. Tapi tak best sgt la. Action memang byk but like what my friend said tak banyak scene battle between a bunch of people. It is more to one to one battle and more to self-conflict. Boring.

Ending pun tak best. Bila dah hbs I was like "dah habis ke? Macam tu je ending?". Tak pe lah since I wanted to watch this movie dah lama. Dah dapat pun though a bit disappointing.

Back To Square One

Exam dah habis. Yabedabedo!! Lepas satu azab. Lama tggu exam habis. Tunggu je la lagi 2 bulan nak dapat results. Time tu confirm takut.

The ques macam soalan membunuh diri. Berganda-ganda susah. Mak aii. Kalau macam ni lah standard lama la nampak gayanya nak habis semua.Tapi perjuangan mesti diteruskan. Cannot and would not give up.

So ape plan after exam? Tido puas2. Kemas bilik. Macam kapal pecah dah bilik ni. Back to square one la. Dah tak boleh nak relax. Dulu tak payah buat ape2. Just sit in the room and study. Next week jadik babysitter Aisyah. I have plan for both of us. Movies, baking, and arts. And yes, I will make sure she study. Habislah budak kecik tu. Tak tau either enough time or not.

Next year gonna be a whole new year. New life, new place, new mission and the brand new 'Alia. Cewahh..ape yang new pun tak tau. Wait and see jelah.

Btw, Atiqah is coming back for good to M'sia after 3 years berhempas-pulas di Australia. 25th December she'll reach LCCT. At last ade jugak member kat rumah ni. Berkotak-kotak barang die. She told me that. I wonder where she will puts all her things.

Argh..lapar plak. Nak makan jap. Daa..

Sanggup Ke?

Sanggup ke nak hadapi semua tu? Kalau ikutkan hati rasa tak nak langsung jadi. Tapi sampai bila nak tahan kehendak sendiri? Sampai bila nak sorokkan benda ni? sampai bila nak jadik pengecut?

Even semua tak confirm lagi, bila pikir benda tu pun dah cuak. Bila org tny kenapa, memang tak boleh jawab sedangkan benda ni yg kena first sekali prepare kalau dah confirm. Keputusan berani mati ni. Risiko tinggi sgt2.

Tak pernah terfikir dan tak mungkin diterima akal bg sesetgh orang. Anything boleh jadik kn. Kalau elak macam mane pun kalau benda nak jadik tetap akan jadik.

Adoiyai. Berat jugak kepala ni. Ape2 pun keputusan akan dibuat nanti. Bukan sekarang.

Blank

I just wanna say yes, but I can't. but I also can't say no. So, what should I do?
Gilalah. Dah lah nak dekat exam boleh pulak pikir pasal lain.

Focus 'Alia. Remember what are your priorities. Study and family. Lain2 would be next in the list, ok?

Deadline. Benci. Nak drag tak boleh coz it involve others. Argh..have to construct ayat yg best. Yang sedap telinga mendengarnya.

Nak run away from it, lagi la. Nothing can be solved if u run away. Face it with courage.

N to you, why this has to be our fate?

Kita belasah je nak tak? Lepas tu baru pikir. This is what we call adventure. Try and error. Tneet....maksudnya kena putuskan. If terus berdenyut, ada nadi means we continue.

Hahaha. Kepala dah weng.

To be continued....Study!!